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Talking To Myself

My words seem to be invincible to the one that they are intended for. I wear my feelings on my sleeve which makes me vulnerable to those that can hurt me. I am blessed with honest emotions in which I can show that I care deeply for the one I love, but I feel at times like I am still talking in the mirror. A mirror in which the reflection shows me all alone in a world believing that a word and a feeling still exist in a world that is full of hatred, selfishness, jealousy, greed and materialism. Can she hear me or am I really that invincible to the one that I adore?

At times, you make my life feel as significant as the presidents and other times you make me feel as insignificant as a one dollar bill is to a billionaire. I feel like a lonely ghost pestering your every movement just waiting for you to notice me, but I haven’t seen you take a glimpse in my direction for a while. It is me or am I just that unremarkable to you anymore? Some women are use to the rich, powerful and flashy, when I am only able to offer my true self and that seems not to be good enough for you.

The more I dwell on it, the more I become entrenched in a idea that I may have to be someone other than myself to get what I truly want, but I can’t imagine not being real to myself.Is it worth it?Do I continue to waste all my energy on someone who doesn’t mourn for my attention like I do for theirs? Do I sit and wait for them to notice my existence or do I move on in my search and wait for someone who will be grateful for my heart, commitment, will power and loyalty? Life has always gotten better for those who believed it wouldn’t and love has found those who never even believed in it. Why is that? Death is a guaranteed promised, but love sometimes can make shallow decisions.

 The beautiful people of the world get to choose their fate with love sometimes and the rich can even buy it for a short amount of time, but it seems that the people, who truly deserve it, always get dealt a bad hand by love. It’s like life is our personal blackjack dealer and he is granted a 21 with every hand. He toys with our emotions just to see how we react, lets our confidence get on a hot streak and then all of a sudden here comes blackjack when we decide to bet big or double down on love. Why is that?

That is the million dollar question to an answer that I can’t afford to receive. I guess I will have to wait until my love account has enough sufficient funds in it to finally get that answer. Until then, I choose to stay memorized by the idea of happiness with someone who truly is meant for me. It’s either that or the idea of being with someone who makes me feel like I’m isolated on an island all alone like a castaway and talking to myself

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Rather Go Blind

Just the site of your existence paralyzes my every movement. Sudden shifts of your body draws my eyes toward you and moves my soul over a foot. Without words, you make my heart feel like it has entered a nightclub of love through a VIP entrance. Now with these sudden thoughts of losing that feeling I would rather go blind, because the mere thought of not having you makes me not want to live. The moments of my life that seem so perfect have you in them, and I couldn’t stand to try and complete life without you being there to complete me.

You are like my asthma pump and without you there, I can’t breathe easy. You leaving me is like taking all the pure oxygen in my world and leaving me with a toxic filled air to breath. If that is what life has in store for me, I would rather go blind and not be able to see what love truly can be.It’s like you baptized me with a touch of love in which my world became clearer and my heart more pure. It was like my love life was receiving heart surgery and waking up to a new promise, a promise where I held my end of the bargain and showed that I understood what real love was. For all that life has blessed me with; you came into my life as an overpowering challenger to my heart. You easily defeated my worry of trust, loyalty and honesty. You made my heart feel safer than a 20 point lead with two minutes to go in the game and Jordan holding the ball.

To me, you are a goddess and to not have you in my personal heaven, I would rather go blind than to see you leaving me to love someone else.For all its worth, I understand that everything in life happens for a reason, but there is no single reason why my heart could ever love another.  You took my heart when it was homeless and gave it comfort, security and meaning. You allowed my soul to recapture its strength when it was once a defeated victim. For that, I owe you my love and I couldn’t think of loving another, because you are the reason I know what love is. The thoughts of tomorrow and the memories of yesterday allow my mind to stay loyal regardless of temptations. You are my diamond and I am engaged to your love and I would rather go blind if I couldn’t have any of the above.

The Distance Between Us

The distance between us keeps my heart trapped in a steel cage away from personal ecstasy. It’s like my feelings for you are in solitary confinement with no chance of getting out. The more I think of you, the worse it gets, because I know that the chance of being with you is highly unlikely. We live in two different worlds, with two different agendas, but yet we seek the same thing. Why is it so hard for us to be together?

Each night as I prepare for bed, I think of us having his and hers sinks, brushing our teeth together, so jolly as the day ends. The thought of us doing that simple feat paralyzes my heart, because I know if that were real, I wouldn’t be writing this. It’s like you are a dream that I never want to wake from, because once I do the nightmare begins. A nightmare in which, a reality of not being with you exist. What do I do precious love? They say love can make anything work, but I have yet to see proof of that.

As special as you are to the world, I couldn’t fathom enough egocentricity to hope that you stayed alone. It would be evil of me to not allow love to flood your life just because I am not in it. You deserve all that God has planned for you, and if I am not in the scenario, so be it. I am completely blissful with seeing you happy. You are like an angel touring the earth, and deserve to experience love as powerful as a mother has for her first child

The only thing I ask of you beautiful one, is that you keep me in your thoughts, and never forget how much love I have for you regardless of the distance. Just the thought of you completes my day and the thought of having you in my life energizes my soul. The hope of our love becoming a reality makes the thousand miles between us seem like city blocks. My feelings for you are so strong that I feel like I could walk those miles without getting a single blister.

So remember this message my love, because it is being written from the heart and no one can forge what the heart speaks. My heart is speaking directly to you and trying to connect with your soul, so let me in and don’t be afraid, because your fears are my fears. The fear of regret lays dormant in my thoughts and I wouldn’t ever forgive myself if I didn’t tell you how I really felt. So this is me telling you now.

You make your move.

 

Love,

Will Harris

 

 

 

 

 

My Empty Pillow

 

As the cold night shivers my half naked body, I can’t help but notice that something is missing in my life that needs to be there. My life is a constant dream to most, yet I did not seek it. I have everything I could have asked for, but I still feel as poor as a man on the street petitioning for change. I have traveled to the ends of the earth for personal glory, yet I feel as if I have not traveled a mile. I’ve had dinners with celebrities, politicians and other important figures alike, but I feel like I have eaten alone for so many years. I have a plethora of friends who are honest, loyal and dependable, yet I feel like I can’t talk to anyone anymore. Something truly is absent in my life, but I can’t understand why.

Night after night I lay in my bed staring at the other side of it, wondering what is to come of the empty pillow that lies next to me. Not knowing if I am ever going to have someone there is the catch-22 that keeps me up at night. For all the beauty and comfort that money brings, I have seen many people go to bed unaccompanied with their own empty pillow beside them. My empty pillow is the most precious thing that I have, because it keeps me mesmerized by the future. Who will she be? What will she look like? Where will she be from? All of those thoughts are nightly routines when I lay alone in my bed.

The older I get, the more anxious I become of the conclusion of that empty pillow. The thought of having the love of my life becoming the rightful owner of that pillow is heaven to me, because I know that is what will make my life whole. Many have tried to lay claim to that empty pillow, but none has captivated my interest long enough to be the one, so now the other side of my bed lays secluded. Isolated from an awkwardness that has been there before, because I knew past counterparts didn’t belong on a pillow that was so divine.

The more I dwell, the more impatient I get, but I refuse to settle even the slightest. It doesn’t matter how stunning or how curvy the rightful owner of my empty pillow may be, it’s how magnificent she will be laying on a pillow that has laid empty for years. My heart and my gut tells me that she is near, so I am preparing my psyche for the one that will claim my lonely heart and lonely pillow, then I finally lay in my bed completely satisfied with life

 

“For everything I been through in life, I never imagined it would be so hard to choose between the two. One has my mind, while the other has my heart. I never thought it was possible to fall in love with two women at the same time, but I have fallen victim to that scenario“.

Apple, a girl from the east coast has my MIND. She is beautiful, bright, with a large personality that intimidates most men. She is a woman of seasons and her frame of mind changes with the weather. She is one of a kind, and has no problem voicing her opinion with her blunt attitude. If you take her for granted, she will eat you alive and spit you out without a thought of sympathy. Men like me come a dime a dozen to her, so my mind-set and charisma is nothing she hasn’t seen. You have to actually work for Apple’s affection, but once you gain it, she is as devoted to you as a dog is to its owner. She is also an insomniac like me, so we are always up doing stuff. She NEVER sleeps.

Angel, a west coast girl, on the other hand has my HEART. She is a pretty Madonna that loves to be catered to and is very materialistic. If you not about your business, you don’t stand a chance in hell to keep her attention. She is so fast paced and will just move on to the next Joe Schmoe while you sit there in sorrowfulness. She lives for the good weather, the beach and the celebrity lifestyle. She is one of those women, who care about what you do for a living, and what kind of car you drive. Angel can be very cold-blooded. She is so Hollywood.

Angel’s persona is so unlike Apple’s, yet both of them have a swagger about them that draws me towards them both.See the dilemma is that I have a long history with Angel and I couldn’t let her go even if I tried. I have fully invested the last couple of years of my life to Angel and to just walk away from her would be foolish. Angel accepted me with open arms when I came into her life with a pocket full of dreams. She supported my goals in acting right from the get go. She usually went for men who had their stuff together, but saw huge potential in me, so she took a gamble. For that reason alone, she has my heart, because she accepted me unconditionally when she could have blew me off from the start.

Apple on the other hand, has been one of those women that I have always said was my type. We clicked the first time we laid eyes on each other and ever since then, she has captivated my mind in ways only a person in love can understand. She suits me well in every way. She is very ethnic and her parents are immigrants, so she understands her ancestor’s history and pride very well, plus she has faced tremendous personal tragedy. She supports my passions, but loves the fact that I have a gift for writing. I used to question myself everyday when it came to developing a relationship with her, but like I said before, she has a reputation that is cold, grimy and blunt which I know is over-exaggerated.

Angel and Apple both know what it’s like to go from nothing to something. They know plenty of people that can give me positive recommendations about business. The rich and beautiful just flock to them and that is something that is both intimidating and encouraging. There is never a dull moment in their lives and they are constantly stepping up their game to impress all of those around them, including me.If there were ever a harder choice to make in life, I would like to know what it is. I can’t go wrong with either choice, but my mind is telling me one thing and my heart is telling me another. I must go and visit them both, to weigh the pros and cons before I choose who I spend the rest of my life with. It saddens me that I have to choose between the two so quickly, but if I don’t soon, I will lose them both. I hope that both of them, Apple and Angel, understand that I am doing this for the benefit of them and me. I hope that I can mend both my mind and heart into one decision and choose wisely.The worst thing in life is, WHAT IF and I don’t want to look back on life questioning my decision after I decide. Hopefully I will make the right choice. 

      

GOD HELP ME
 
 
 

 

IT

 

In the blink of an eye, IT can make you feel as powerful as a president or as low as a man living on the streets. IT never waits for you, constantly flowing with movement and determination trying to find the next best thing. Once you get a hold of IT, you should never let IT go and should do anything to keep IT. As time passes you by, you begin to underestimate the value that IT has in your life, and you become lethargic in your approach to keep IT. Once you lose IT, you become depressed and sadden by the sudden reality of IT being gone. What are left are bitter memories of good times and joyful moments that turn you into an insomniac. IT never seems to worry about you as much as you should for IT, because IT has options and your value to IT is nothing compared to the value IT holds for you.When IT is fertilized into your life, things grow at a rapid rate and life seems to be much clearer and less stressful on a regular basis. IT can take the ugliest man off the streets and turn him into Brad Pitt or Will Smith in the matter of seconds. IT give’s hope to the hopeless and makes certain people feel as important as Barack Obama. IT is something that is both priceless and expensive. Priceless in a way, that takes something ordinary and turns IT into something that is rare as a unicorn. Expensive in a way, because IT will turn a person who once possessed a caring heart, into a person as heartless as Kanye West smash hit. That IT was designed to protect itself from people who are careless and shallow, but like all things, IT falls into the wrong hands at times.If you are one of the few lucky people on this earth to experience IT, then you are in a rare category of people. Though unselective, IT tends to follow people who have good hearts and great minds, but like I said, IT can land into the wrong hands and become a problematic situation for many because of one foolish mind. IT shows neither feelings nor favoritism. IT just cruises through life stopping at every red light enjoying the moment until it reaches its next destination.

My advice to those who will read this is, enjoy every second that you will have with IT, because IT is not guaranteed to all, and will appear and disappear as quickly as good weather in Minnesota. 

God Bless

My Dear Sunshine

Dear Sunshine,To me you are the light of my world and I’m always on cloud nine when I see your bright face. Even the days you surprise me with your late arrivals, I am always captivated by your beauty. I know for a fact that god specifically created you for my protection. I know that you are a gift to the world and everyone respects your beauty and power. You are magical and provide the much needed warmth that my body and heart needs when I am feeling down. No matter where I am at in the world, you are always there for me most of the time and I’m honored for that specific reason.

So with that description of my love for you, I was flabbergasted the day I woke up and realized you were not there anymore. It was like a burglar coming into my life and stealing my joy. Every day I looked forward to you being there and I always could rely on you, but out of all days, you decided to leave me when I needed you most.I really didn’t value you much until I relocated to be closer to you in Phoenix. You were beyond beautiful when I first met you, but then I took you for granted when I picked up and left to Minneapolis in 2005 to train for basketball. I knew I’d made a horrible decision the first second I landed at MSP airport. I would always think about how other people may be having a great time with you in Phoenix that I couldn’t sleep at night because I missed you so much.

I was so exultant when I moved California to be with you. There were no grudges when it came to the past and you didn’t care about my time in Illinois, Florida, Indiana or Minnesota. You were flawless in your efforts to keep me happy, so that I wouldn’t leave you again and you convinced me. I promised you that I would follow you to the ends of the earth and I did that. I went with you to Australia, I was there for you went you relocated to Miami and then back to Los Angeles. Yes my dear, you have a special place in my heart and I don’t want to lose you. If I was anywhere else, I would be so cold and lonely. You are my never ending sunshine.

My life this week has been miserable with work being more than hectic and some R&R with you was just what I needed. I was going to gather my things and meet you at the beach, so I could stare at your beautiful face under God’s amazing sky, then you decided to go AWOL on me. Where have you gone my love?

Weeks have passed since I last seen and spent time with you and I am worried you are not coming back. If there is anything I did to offend you or make you mad, I apologize. I would get on my knees in front of the whole world to have you back in my life and I am sure they would as well. I remember people telling me once I had you, I would be stupid to lose you or not appreciate you, so I am begging you give me one more chance my love. I just want to bask in the glory of your unconditional beauty. My dear beautiful, SUN. 

Sincerely, 

Will Harris

The First Girl I Ever Loved

When we all get older there will be many memories and moments that captured our hearts from the past. Regardless of the present state, those moments will bring us joy, sadness and pain just with the thought of that memory. The reason being is that we wouldn’t be who we are if it wasn’t for it. The memory that I have that is so unforgettable, is of a girl who showed me what love was for the first time. Her name was Leslie.

It was 1987 and I was six years old attending Lewis elementary school in Carbondale, Illinois. It was the first day of class in a brand new school and I was expectedly nervous. I didn’t know anyone and I was very shy at the time, so I just grab the first seat I could at an empty desk. As the kids started to fill up the class room little by little, I looked down at my folder and pulled out a piece of paper and began to draw. I would always draw on paper when I got nervous as a kid and I was very nervous at interacting with people I didn’t know, so I just looked down at the paper and avoided eye contact.

I heard the teacher calling out the names of students and ask them to say they were present. As she called out the names, I continued to draw and scribble on the paper to avoid looking up. I heard her say William Harris and I raised my hand to notify I was present and she called my name again, “Is William Harris here?” I then said, “Here” with a quiet voice as if I was whispering something to a friend. She continued until she finished the names and begins to speak in front of the class about the first day of school. The teacher then asked everyone to come up in front of class and introduce themselves. One by one, kids went up excitingly and introduce themselves to the class, as I mourned at the idea of speaking in front of people. As the kids continued to speak, a woman appeared in the doorway and interrupted our class with an announcement. She told the teacher that she would have one more student in her class and introduced her to the class. “Class this is Leslie Gamble”, she said and the students in the class said, “Hi Leslie”.

From the moment I saw her I was in awe of her beauty. She was a pretty girl with very long hair, green eyes and she was wearing a sky blue flower dress the first time I saw her. The teacher asked Leslie to find a desk and have a seat, so she walked to the back of the room and sat down in an empty desk right next to me. She seemed like a very nervous girl herself from what I first noticed. She started drawing on a piece of paper and looking down the same way I did and I was shocked, because I thought I was the only person who did that. Right from the beginning, me and Leslie had a connection before we ever spoke.

As weeks past, the kids in the class begin to start their own clicks outside for recess and I was the odd man out , so I played by myself most of the time until I noticed one day Leslie sitting alone. She looked sad and frustrated and that’s when I spoke to her for the first time. I asked her what was wrong and she told me that no one in the class liked her or wanted to play with her. I told her I felt the same way and she looked at me and said, “Why wouldn’t anyone want to play with you? You are the same color as everyone else, I am different.” In fact, she was different. Leslie was a white kid in a predominantly black school and she also was one of the first white kids I ever interacted with, as I was one of the first black kids she ever interacted with. Leslie and her family had moved to Carbondale from Iowa, because of a job opportunity her mother received with the university. She was definitely in a different element and it was bothering her because she felt the kids didn’t like her because she was white. I assured her that other kids would warm up to her if she talked more. She agreed and a friendship was made.

Leslie and I began to hang around each other every day at recess while the other kids did their own thing. We talked about life, cartoons, music and movies, something very mature for first graders to be doing at the time. I talked to her about the absent father in my life and she talked about her older brother who always picked on her. I laugh at it now, because I use to tell her I would beat her brother up if he picked on her, but I didn’t know he was in the 7th grade until I saw him one day after school when her mom came to pick her up. She was a real life Barbie doll and always looked the part when it came to clothes. Her mom looked like she was a former model and made sure Leslie looked the best.

One day our teacher asked us to partner up for a class project and I and Leslie chose to stay a unified couple. The project was to draw all the planets of the solar system and color them. I thought it was a cool project being that I was into space and all, but there was just one problem, I didn’t have any crayons. I had one box of crayons that I got at the beginning of the year, but I had destroyed those and couldn‘t afford more, so I just hoped for this situation to never happen and it did. I told Leslie that I didn’t have any crayons and she looked at me and said I could use hers. She had the double decker box of crayons that I thought only rich people could afford. She never cared about sharing, she was so nice about everything and I could tell she was raised right. There were many times I didn’t have paper or a pencil and I would ask a kid and they would tell me no, but Leslie was always there for me.

As more group projects were assigned, Leslie and I always stuck together even when paired with other kids. She would continue to let me use her things and I would show her my appreciation at recess by performing songs from the movie the Labyrinth, a 1980’s movie made by Jim Henson, the puppet master. I would sing these songs and perform them every day to her and another girl name Alisha that she befriended after a while. They would sit and giggle as I sung and sung making a fool of myself, but I never cared because I knew she was a good friend. Times were never dull with us, we’d play tether ball together and would make each other laugh hysterically by spinning ourselves on the swings until we were dizzy and try to walk it off. We did that every single day and it never got bored. What we had was special and I haven’t felt like that since about another girl.

It was around March when I received the worst news of my life up until that point. Leslie came to school one day and told me she was moving because her mother got another job. I was devastated because she was the only reason why I got up in the morning to go to school. She was my world at the time and she knew it, but it wasn’t anything she could do about it, so I had to swallow it and deal with it. She told me that she expressed her sadness to her mother and her mom assured that we would stay in contact. It was like someone taking all my happiness and flushing down the drain, I couldn’t stop thinking about what would happen once she left.

The last day of class for Leslie was on a Friday and we were told that a class party was going to happen last period for Leslie. Her mother brought cake, cookies, soda and chips for the class and we ate like it was our own birthdays. We all had a good time and expressed how much we were going to miss her and then the teacher let us go play outside for the last 15 minutes of class.As I was about to go run outside to play, Leslie leaned into me and said don’t leave the class I want to give you a present. I was wondering why she would give me a present after all she has done for me; I should be giving her one.

 As the kids darted out the class and preceded to the playground, I stayed back like she asked me and she looked around until no one was in the class and pulled out a present. She told me to open it and said that she bought it with her own money. It was a big box, so I had no clue what it could be, but I began to open the present anyway. When I tore apart the paper, there stood a brand new box of double decker crayons (You know the ones only rich kids get) just for me. She told me that she saved her money up just to buy me the same crayons she has. As I stood there in shock, she leaned in and kisses me. It was the first kiss I had ever gotten and it was from a girl who just bought me the best gift ever. I was in love.

 As class ended and the bell rung, I walked Leslie to her car with her mom caring the leftover cake and snacks and felt very sad. Her mom gave me a hug and Leslie gave me one to and she got into the car and said that she would miss me. She drove off waving and I stood there like I had just lost my home in a hurricane. I had just received my first lesson in heartbreak and disappointment and knew it wouldn’t be the last.I never saw or heard from Leslie again. The memories that I have of the first grade are all of her and that box of crayons. She was truly something special and has had a place in my heart ever since. I just hope one day that I can feel that same way about a woman that I did about a girl name Leslie, who bought me a box of crayons and loved me for me.TRUE STORY…

Guardian Angel

 

As I lay there immovable in a comatose state of mind, you never left my side. It was months of the same routine and you didn’t distrust yourself one second. An unfortunate accident caused my life and your heart to be tested and you showed what great love is.You are the definition for unconditional.What laid ahead for me was an uncertain outcome and you still remained by my side. The doctors said it was a foregone conclusion for me, but you remained hopeful while others doubted.

Months went by and you stayed in that hospital room clutching onto me with your love and your faith. You proved to me that faith in something was far stronger than faith in nothing. I heard you speaking to God one night asking him to give me another chance, and I knew by your tone that you believe I deserved one even when I didn’t think so myself. You are so special to me and I want you to know that. The quiet whispers that you softly spoke with were heard by my soul and swallowed by my heart. Your love kept me alive even when I shouldn’t have been and I love you ever more for that.

There is something to be said about the human spirit when it knows it is loved. It can gain the strength of a thousand men in the most extreme circumstances when it knows that love is reciprocated and you proved that.I couldn’t open my eyes or move a muscle, but my heart never stopped beating, because it is forever linked with yours. As long as you are by my side, I am invincible to sadness and pain, you comfort me in a way that a mother does her first born right after giving birth, and it is magical.I am honored that you chose to be my life partner, when you could have chosen so many others to be with. I know that everything in life happens by choice and good reason, but for some unfortunate one, you choice to be by my side and I am humbled in your presence.You proved to me that love conquers all things and all doubters.

I sat in that intensive care unit unable to see, speak or move for eight months and finally awoke after so many wrote me off and it was because of your strength, your faith and your LOVE.

 

 

I want to say thank you my GUARDIAN ANGEL

Alexander The Moor

Alexander the Moor

By Will Harris

Gifted with a rare ability to play the flute, Alexander, a Moor from Morocco became the finest musician the world had ever known up until his early death at the age of eighteen. It has been told that he was related to the beautiful Cleopatra VII. Rumor was that she had a long-lost sister that was cast out of Egypt for sleeping with her lover and was never heard from again. Alexander, an only child, was raised in morocco by his mother until he and his mother were sold off as slaves to people in the Roman Empire. Shortly after the move to Rome, his mother, who was as beautiful as her rumored sister committed suicide by stabbing herself when three roman soldiers attempted to rape her while she was retrieving water from a pond. At fourteen Alexander suddenly became an orphan.

The only memory of his mother, was a red flute that his mother made and gave to him when he was little boy. After her death, he promised to become the best flutist in the world and vowed to keep his mother’s memory alive through his music. Over the next couple years, he became exceptionally talented with his skills and earned superior respect amongst the people in the slave quarters of Rome being called the finest flutist they ever heard.

He was dubbed Alexander the moor after several roman guards heard him playing the flute while patrolling the slave quarters. The guards then went to tell of his magnificent talent to a general, who was a flutist himself. He was then summoned into the royal quarters as a guest. He was the first slave ever to be presented with such an honor. He spent the next few months teaching and entertaining royalty with his gifted ability.

At the age of seventeen while serving as a slave/teacher in the Roman Empire, Alexander was allowed to live inside royal quarters and receive special treatment for his abilities by Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus himself. The only request from the emperor was to never get involved romantically with anyone of royal decent. He agreed and began to live a life of royalty and was treated as equal by members of the upper class in Rome. He was allowed to teach in the slave quarters and return whenever he wanted. He served as honorary host to all weddings around the empire. He was truly living a life that was supposed to be his from the beginning, with him being related to Cleopatra. He was tall, well-built, charming and beautiful in every way and women in the royal quarters down to the slave quarters adored him for his talents and beauty.

On his eighteenth birthday, Caesar threw Alexander a birthday party and announced that he was to be treated as if he was his own son. When he was asked to speak on the honor that Augustus bestowed on him, he got teary eyed and said that all he cared for was to keep his mother’s memory alive with his music. He said that anyone who learns from him will keep his mother’s legacy alive long after he is gone. The crowd was in awe of such humble grace, a man who just a year earlier was a slave living in the worst quarters of Rome.

One day while teaching a group of kids, Alexander was requested to Augustus living quarters for a special message. Augustus told him that a royal family would be coming to the empire to stay for a while and they heard of his talents and wanted him to teach the princess. Augustus told him it was an honor to have such a request being so young and he suggested that he drop everything and do it. Alexander agreed and prepared himself for the chance to meet another royal family.

When the royal family arrived, he was summoned to their living quarters and he met Italiya, a beautiful seventeen year old princess, who was to be married soon to a thirty-four year old prince named Bractus. From the moment their eyes connected, Alexander and Italiya were in love. Whenever he looked at her, he saw a striking resemblance of his beautiful mother that he loved so dearly. Italiya, who was very superstitious, told him that he reminded her of a boy she sees in her dreams, a slave who is loved by all. Not knowing that he was really a slave, Alexander didn’t reveal his true identity out of fear of backlash from Augustus. He had been warned not to frolic with royalty and he had been obedient up until now, but his heart just knew what it wanted and he couldn’t control himself.

Over the course of the next few weeks, they shared romantic music lessons, walks around the empire and picnics near beautiful lakes. Alexander finally even showed her the slave quarters where he taught and lived just a year ago. They were uncontrollably in love and couldn’t resist each other. They were both young and foolish and love blinded them from the reality of what could happen if they ever were caught. She eventually snuck into his sleeping quarters late at night and they made love dozens of times.

One night while attempting to sneak away from her soon to be husband Bractus, Italiya woke up her fiancé when she was leaving to go see Alexander. He asked where she was going and she said for a walk. He didn’t think anything of it until hours passed without her returning and he worried of her whereabouts. Bractus then summoned his guards to go look for her and he awoke Augustus fearing she had been kidnapped. Out of respect for his guest, Augustus orders everyone in the royal quarters to wake. When no sight of Italiya and Alexander was revealed, the prince feared the worst and became enraged.

Not knowing that there was manhunt for their whereabouts, Alexander and Italiya had scurried off and made love near a river under a pale moonlight on the outskirts of Rome and fallen asleep naked by accident. They were soon discovered by Augustus guards and forced to returned to the royal quarters and confess. Once they confessed, Augustus had no choice but to punish Alexander by whatever request the prince demanded. Bractus out of jealous rage ordered his hands be cut off so he would never play his precious flute again or touch another man’s wife. Augustus had no choice but to oblige and sadly cut off the greatest musician to ever live hands. So enraged of the deceitful ways of his fiancé, the prince cut out the eyes of Italiya, so that she would never look at another man. Knowing that it was his fault that Italiya would never see again and knowing that he would never play music again, he felt there was no reason to live and ended his life the same way his precious mother did. He somehow stabbed himself in the stomach and bled to death.

The news spread around the empire quickly that Alexander died and it was one of the saddest days in Rome’s history. Alexander the moor, loved by all and respected by the great emperor Augustus himself was dead at the age of eighteen, because he loved someone who loved him back. Augustus himself cried for weeks after the ordeal and ordered the city of Rome to celebrate his life in a week-long festival. It was a sad and fitting end to a boy who died so beautiful, so young, so talented and so soon.